Wednesday, August 06, 2003

I just yelled at my sister because she was ANNOYING the crap out of me. ANNOYING. You know like how you can just get so annoyed that your whole body just tenses up and you're frustrated to the point where you can't verbally describe your feelings? Yeah.. like that. She just kept on insisting and insisting... and when I rolled my eyes and groaned "Oh my gosh... I'm gonna scream"... she laughed. The brat snickered at me. So I screamed. I screamed LOUD and in my "psycho voice" (which is a very rare voice that I use... in fact its only used when extremely "irked"). My dear little sister got all angry and left my room in a giant huff.

And now I feel a bit bad. You might call it *guilt*. I really should have kept my loud voice in check... but then I don't think I would have had a moment's peace without it. Not that I'm feeling any sort of "peace" at the moment...

DAMMIT!

In another paragraph...

Thing that pisses me off sometimes is when you do something... and then someones tells you how you did it wrong or how you could have improved upon it. In a nutshell, I don't take criticism well. I think its my wack way of thinking though... if someone says "why didn't you..." it interprets in my mind as "hey dumbass... yeah you... let me count the ways you're retarded" and I basically shut down. Don't talk to me. This doesnt happen all the time though... thats just unhealthy. It only happens when certain people do it... over and over and over again that you can't help to think that theres something wrong.

Oh, but say something to the extent of "Good job"... I'll become your puppy dog and bask in the sunshine of your "love." I guess I'm just pathetic and easy like that. Eager to please.

Ugh. Enough with the "Woe is me" blog. Its not going anywhere, I'm not making sense, and I'm not feeling any relief from this "vent." Another fine example not being able to verbally communicate how I'm feeling. If I could... I'd grunt. But that just hurts my throat. :P Plus in 5 days time I'm sure I'll look back and roll my eyes at another overdramatic moment in which I made myself a victim of absolutely nothing.

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