K. Can anyone help?

This Christmas I have a family party to go to and the "kids" (who are all now between the ages of 16-27) are going to participate in the usual white elephant christmas gift madness.

The minimum is $50.

I need ideas folks. I don't want to end up throwing a gift certificate in the mix because where's the fun and creativity in that? Last year, the bummy gift was a garage door sensor... and it went to one of the two kids who actually couldn't drive. Now, I don't want to contribute anything so sucky that you feel bad when somebody actually gets it... rather something that people will fight over. Something that will make people go "wow... that's cool! forget the pile of wrapped gifts... I WANT THAT!!" But I just can't think of anything...

I may just buy $50 worth of porn. Kids like porn right?

I'm running out of creative juice when it comes to my Christmas shopping! But luckily I'm like 60% done... unless I forgot someone, then in that case I'm screwed.

Anyways, yesterday as I was driving back home, I passed by a store to see a little boy around the age of 6 years old licking the doors to the shop. It was the cutest and most disgusting thing... but then it reminded me of the day when I was younger and enjoyed the taste of the stone fireplace. I used to lick that wall like it was ice cream and the thought of it is making my mouth water. Eww.. what the hell...

Borders didn't have "White Christmas" either. Is this a conspiracy!?!

I forgot to mention, but in my training class, I was talking to the guy next to me and it turned out that he lives in my old town, went to my high school's brother school, and he's family friends with my second grade teacher. What are the odds huh? Yes Jean, he's cute... but totally not my type. That is if you like those white, blond, handsome, nice dressing metrosexual types. Um.. yeah. What was my type again?

I need some help.

Curse you Target! Curse you for not having "WHITE CHRISTMAS" on DVD!!

Someday...

Anyways, despite not having my dosage of HOT CHRISTMAS PORN ("Nicole... don't write that. Auntie Nene reads your blog!"- Carlene) life is pretty... good. :) I started the new job this week and although its just training at the moment, everyone so far is super duper nice and they aren't psychotic... nor do they want to kill me. So everyone's happy! :) Hurrah! But yeah, I'm really loving everyone and everything. Really, I'm just a big ball of lovin. Just watch though, in a couple of months I'll be very jaded and be very "anti-job" but we'll take it one step at a time. :)

Oh boogers...

Last night, I had it all planned out. I was going write out my Christmas postcards while watching "White Christmas". It was going to be a perfectly cozy afternoon. Maybe have some cocoa... light the fire... and just feast my eyes and ears on Bing Crosby and Rosemary Clooney while working on perfecting my penmanship. But!!

My "White Christmas" video had gone missing!

Ok. So then I thought... I can still do this. I already had planned to go out and get the DVD for $14.99 at Target so at least NOW I had good reason to do it later on... so now I was just going to write out my postcards, watch some TV, and be merry. But!!

I couldn't find my address book!

Crap. My adorable pink address book had gone missing. And without it, I couldn't write postcards because if I didn't have an adress, there would be no point in putting on a stamp! And that SUCKS!

I know I know... tragic huh. Anyways, I'm currently in works of collecting addresses (email me your addresses pretty pretty please!)... so hopefully soon I will be able to send out the CUTEST Christmas postcards that Sonny (the Canadian) and Carlene made of Sonny (the dog) and Penelope. :) Really... its adorable.

Ahhhh... mini vacation. Too bad its too damn cold, not to mention that I don't have much money, to do anything really worthwhile before I venture off into the real world, but having quality time with Oprah, Bob Barker, Baba Wawa and the other girls of The View the is good enough.

"I'm on the View... I'm totally nude... I'm on the View... this is my birthday suit."

Sorry. Random crap coming out of my head I tell you.

:)

Nicole and Carlene: (singing) You say po-tay-to... I say po-tay-to...
Mom: No. You guys are singing it all wrong. You're supposed to say "po-tat-to."
Nicole and Carlene: Ok! (singing) You say po-tat-to, I say po-tat-to... You say to-may-to, I say to-may-to...
Mom: No! You're supposed to say it different. To-mat-to.
Nicole and Carlene: Alright. (singing) To-mat-to, to-mat-to, po-tat-to po-tat-to... let's call the whole thing off.
Mom: You guys are stupid.

Sometimes life imitates art... or just a SNL opening with Christopher Walken and Jimmy Fallon. :) Carlene and I love this skit and we were in giggles over the fact that Mom wasn't getting it. Hilarious.

Anyways, if I were to stay up for another 2 hours, I'd be up for 24 hours. My bosses weren't lying when they said that they'd be working me to the VERY END. Good gracious...

Nicole's last day rundown:
3:00 am: Alarm goes off.
3:30 am: Alarm goes off.
3:45 am: Alarm goes off.
3:50 am: Get out of bed to find that breaker had gone off and there is no electricty in room. Grope around for clothes.
4:15 am: Pick up Sarah and start drive to Pechanga... its dark.
5:00 am: Get gas and coffee...
5:15 am: Arrive at Pechanga. Its still dark and its COLD.
5:15-11:30 am: Work work work. It's a HUGE company Christmas party,,, ho ho ho!
11:40 am: Sarah and I leave Pechanga
12:15 pm: See sign for Tom's Farm and decide to go to the deli. Also see WINE TASTING... so had a few samples of almond champange. Yum!
1:00 pm: Leave for La Mirada
1:42pm: Arrive at La Mirada
1:42pm: Sleep in the car.
1:55pm: Alarm goes off.
2:00pm: Wake up and get out of car.
2:00-6:00pm: Work work work!
7:00 pm: Arrive home
7:30-9:00pm: Dinner with family
9:00pm: Try to nap... but wait they're showing FOOTLOOSE on tv! What a town with no dancing?? Have you see them dance... totally makes sense now huh.
10:00pm: Nap time!
10:45pm: Alarm goes off.
10:55pm: Alarm goes off.
11:00pm: Alarm goes off.
11:15pm: Sarah picks me up and go to back to La Mirada for teardown.
12:25am: Done! :)
1am: I'm home. I'm sleepy. But hyper... talking to Jean now and blogging at the moment.

So I'm done and I'm a little sad. All during the day, everyone was making jokes such as "Nicole, if you drop that bouquet, you're fired." or "I don't know about this... I QUIT!" When I was saying my goodbyes, I waved at Doug and said "Oh no! I might never see you again!" to which Sarah replied, "Whatever. She'll come to you when she gets married..."

I might never see them again!

Nah. I'm gonna work events if I have the time on the side. You can't separate a girl from her twinkle lights and flowers. :)

Argh! My fingers are cold and I'm getting dizzy! Bed time! :)

If you want to bump it... BUMP IT WITH A TRUMPET!!

Can it BE any colder!? Good gracious... this morning there was frost on the grass. If this were a farm, the crop would be GONE and we would starve this winter!! I gave in and I'm typing with my mittens on. And it's still nippy. Eek!

Yesterday had to be the worse though. To make a long story short... Sonny's car got broken into the day after Thanksgiving so the driver's side window is all smashed in... Carlene's radiator blew up... so Sonny took my mom's car while Carlene took mine since Corona is much closer for me to take Sonny's windowless car. So it was me, in my ski jacket and gloves, driving down the 91. But since it was going to be freezing, my mom had taped up the window with a piece of blue plastic tarp... so although it wasn't AS cold and windy as it could be, I just had one giant eye monstrosity blocking my vision... so as you can imagine, making righthand turns were DANGEROUS. I made it to work, but on the way back, I got ansy (see: annoyed at f*ck) and took down whatever pieces of the tarp that I can. Unfortunantly not all of it came down and so driving home was windy, cold, and LOUD seeing that the leftover plastic was flapping madly in the breeze, slapping me every chance it had.


Brr. I get chills just thinking about it.

Anyways, so this week is my last week at the wedding place. I think that by Friday, I'll be tearing up quite a bit seeing that I've been pretty emotional so far the last 2 days. Today, I made my last buttonieres and corsages... yesterday was my last flower shipment... tomorrow, my last centerpieces... but as much as I'm going to miss the work (CHAIRCOVERS CAN GO TO HELL!! BURN BITCHES BURN!), I'm going to miss my bosses and coworkers a whole lot more. I'm scared, what if my new bosses and coworkers at D aren't plesant to work with? What if they're mean and horrid and secretly want to kill me? I dunno... but I really am going to miss Doug, Brandy and sarah. Where else will I be able hear weekly recaps on reality tv and talk smack about the crazies on THE AMAZING RACE and who we love in the SURREAL LIFE? Who will I get to learn the newest country music fact from? Who's going to make fun of random people and come up (and act out) bizarre situations with me? No one is going to quiz me on classic rock anymore. Who's going to rap the "REVENGE OF THE NERDS" rap whenever the electronic Christmas music comes on? Who's going to get creeped out with me whenever we hear Rod Stewart and Dolly Parton's version of "Baby its cold outside" because it sounds like Rod Stewart is a sexual predator and he wants to rape Dolly Parton (You know!) Who's going to huff paint/toxins while working and then burst into giggles when I think about waffles with me? Awww... but then again... NO MORE CHAIRCOVERS!! GOODBYE LARGE WHITE IVORY LIGHT GOLD SASHES!!


Exciting stuff. :)